Nincs mit

i have to mention them. i have a long line of experiences not ever put to writing. there were so many things happened. some are better put to rest, and others are somewhat worthy of everyone's wasted time.

i rediscovered what i can do in some things. i can be in control of what i want. i can do whatever i like in Facebook, Tumblr, and so on, of course, with ample caution of what i share to others. i resurrected my buried interests once or twice set aside because of some obligations. along with that, i realised and embraced new preferences with the help of some friends. much of these rediscoveries and discoveries were realised on the Web. this year and the last months of the previous year, things passed by so fast, and i was able to grasp and pick the ones i like surprisingly as quickly as they pass. i sealed parts of what i really want, all tucked away never or can be hard to change.

it is quite true that many of what i learned are from the films i watched. i may have applied them in real life with or without knowing them. just last year, a heightened interest to moving pictures overcame me. it seems like it wanted to become my first priority. it is true what a Facebook friend once said. i am born in a different era. I belong--to quote Fringe-- in a different universe and time. of course, i do not limit myself to learning about life only through watching films. i also read books and other writings either serious or junk, watch news, and so on. it is fun to learn by oneself, being objective and fair and understanding. i might have become more open to the happenings in the world, to politics, to technology, and to criticism. there are so many that poked and are still poking my mind.

recently, i am into photography. photography for my self-satisfaction and not because it is becoming like a trend today. i don't care how hi-tech the tool i use, but what's important is that you have the necessary one to produce creative masterpieces.

forgive the exaggeration of all these, but only through this i can explain what i feel while writing about all these. there are many other things. if some of you are still interested, i can still share them in another entry. my world revolves around these things. i am enjoying sharing about them.

Moppet

Alas! No apples were with him

As he went back home

Basket had none up to the brim

After an endless roam

He did wait for something to fall

Couldn’t climb, age hinders

Maybe, someday, when he is tall

He’ll pick some every summer

My Top Favourite Films

Here’s a list of my top 15 favourite films of all time in alphabetical order. The list may change as I discover and watch more films both from the past and the present.

1 2001: A Space Odyssey
- Stanley Kubrick


2 Bronenosets Potyomkin (Battleship Potemkin)
- Sergei Eisenstein


3 City Lights
- Charlie Chaplin


4 Dracula (1931)
- Tod Browning


5 The Deer Hunter
- Michael Cimino


6 The Godfather
- Francis Ford Coppola


7 It's a Wonderful Life
- Frank Capra


8 M (Eine Stadt Such Einen Moerder)
- Fritz Lang


9 Mad Love
- Karl Freund


10 Metropolis (1927)
- Fritz Lang


11 One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest
- Milos Forman


12 Platoon
- Oliver Stone


13 Rain Man
- Barry Levinson


14 Rear Window
- Alfred Hitchcock


15 Son of Frankenstein
- Rowland V Lee

Phil. Election 2010

First time to vote. Because of excitement, can’t help taking some pictures to remember…

"Tagok ng tawanan, kulay ng daigdig na tumutunog sa aking bukas na paningin: naguudyok, nagaanyaya"

did Earth ever invited me to stroll with it and look around? i guess so.. i’ve always known myself as someone not always sure at everything ‘til i feel i’m sure at it.. maybe i’m figuratively and metaphorically blind like Shakespeare’s constant love in hamlet and 116. i like ‘on the spot’ moments. love it, actually. coupled with randomness. i’m random at this moment. am not sure (ha! told ya!) if these words mean anything.

back to Earth.. maybe it did poke me, but i wasn’t aware of it. now, i think it’s beginning to get clear, thrive on an empty random mind: it gave me its colors, its flash, its tumble, rise, and fall. everything on it might have or might not have noticed them. someone triggered a spark of thought, and i thank you for that.

smile or laughter. that’s my answer when i’ve nothing to say. it’s also a way of letting people know i understand. smile is acceptance, laughter is awareness and belonging; mutual understanding; sublime and poignant connection and contact. a lot of patience, me that is. but a taurus in character. a non-conformist at some point, and i like it. it seems different, and different can be an innovation. new, ‘always try new things’ — i remember that from a film. this coming 10, on Shakespeare’s darling buds of May, something new to me will happen. i hope it turns out fine. maybe Earth will poke me again and invite me to another stroll. who knows? it might enlighten me on what to do.

Charlie Chaplin on his 70th birthday

As I Began to Love Myself

As I began to love myself I found that anguish and emotional suffering are only warning signs that I was living against my own truth.

Today, I know, this is “Authenticity“.

As I began to love myself I understood how much it can offend somebody as I try to force my desires on this person, even though I knew the time was not right and the person was not ready for it, and even though this person was me.

Today I call it “Respect“.

As I began to love myself I stopped craving for a different life, and I could see that everything that surrounded me was inviting me to grow.

Today I call it “Maturity“.

As I began to love myself I understood that at any circumstance, I am in the right place at the right time, and everything happens at the exactly right moment, so I could be calm.

Today I call it “Self-confidence“.

As I began to love myself I quit steeling my own time, and I stopped designing huge projects for the future. Today, I only do what brings me joy and happiness, things I love to do and that make my heart cheer, and I do them in my own way and in my own rhythm.

Today I call it “Simplicity“.

As I began to love myself I freed myself of anything that is no good for my health - food, people, things, situations, and everything the drew me down and away from myself. At first I called this attitude a healthy egoism.

Today I know it is “Love of oneself“.

As I began to love myself I quit trying to always be right, and ever since I was wrong less of the time.

Today I discovered that is “Modesty“.

As I began to love myself I refused to go on living in the past and worry about the future. Now, I only live for the moment, where EVERYTHING is happening.

Today I live each day, day by day, and I call it “Fulfillment“

As I began to love myself I recognized that my mind can disturb me and it can make me sick. But As I connected it to my heart, my mind became a valuable ally.

Today I call this connection “Wisdom of the heart“.

We no longer need to fear arguments, confrontations or any kind of problems with ourselves or others. Even stars collide, and out of their crashing new worlds are born.

Today I know that is “Life“!

broken blossoms (luminous pollution)

starlight. like sand in the night sky shining bright
luminous beauty and streaks of gargantuan delight.
present day lights killed its dazzling jewels
replacing it with artificiality's fuels

now night is blinded by incandescence
Orion's belt trifled with its sinister presence
can constellations beat the beastly lights of the city
and conquer with might once more in perpetuity?

off to where my mind takes me

-- great. John Barrowman will not play Raoul in Love Never Dies. he could have been a great choice. ah, Andrew. speaking of Andrew Lloyd Webber, last year he revealed he has prostate cancer. that was sad. a bit shocked, but have read he's getting along fine.

--so many changes and new things: taste, preferences, interests, environment. but i am still the same person, i guess.

--i began to pursue the quest of watching the greatest films in the world ever produced since their invention and discovery. i am having fun. i even bought the book 1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die.

--a new hobby: writing film reviews. getting inclined to and acquainted with everything about films.

--nothingness, Facebook, violin. ah, the violin. am teaching myself like Chaplin. i've been eager to play it since forever. only now had I the chance to buy a small one and fiddle.

--Cats the Musical: in Manila with Lea Salonga as Grizabella. will i go or what? I want to, but the ticket's expensive. no, i have to for experience's sake.

--random thoughts: hilarity, photo capture, black and white, Frank Capra, Jimmy Stewart, Lionel Barrymore, millionaire tramp, surrealism, Bronenosets Potyomkin, dance of the rolls, 'yes... this is all about me. wonderful, isn't it?' (not me saying, but I imagine someone saying it)... very random...